Make Me Laugh for Weekend of August 02, 2013.
This week’s Make Me Laugh was submitted by Cindy Argiento. Check out Cindy’s blog and book Deal With Life’s Stress With ‘A Little Humor’, at cindyargiento.com. Cindy does speaking engagements to promote and sell her book.
A boot is a boot, is a boot, right? Wrong! My husband was assigned one task, buy snow boots for our daughter. It was early in the day, the sun was shining and hopes were high for buying a pair of boots. Entering the mall I was confident a purchase would quickly be made with all the stores available to us. Hah, was I wrong! Within five minutes of entering the first store my husband and daughter ran up to me exclaiming they found a pair of boots and so, now we could go home and watch the game on television. After checking out the boots, I told my husband, “Put them back and look for something else.” Looking perplexed he inquired, “Why, it’s a boot, isn’t it?” “Those are not snow boots, they’re leather boots. Have you ever seen a cow frolic and play in the snow?” “Since I wasn’t raised on a farm I have never seen cows frolic and play, ever.” “Well, believe me; they wouldn’t want to run in the snow wearing leather boots.”
It was back to the drawing board for father and daughter. They returned within seconds proudly holding a second pair of boots. My husband exclaimed once again they found the perfect boot and now we could go home and watch the game. I looked at the boots in question, looked at my husband and said, “I don’t think you want your daughter wearing those boots.” “But, it’s a boot, why wouldn’t I want her to wear them? You better give me something better than cows frolicking and playing.” “Ok, remember the movie ‘Pretty Woman’ and the scene where Richard Gere sees Julia Roberts for the first time, walking the streets?” “Yeah, so what?” “Well, those are the exact boots she had on. I don’t think you want your daughter to frolic and play the way she did.” He dropped the boots like a hot potato and quickly returned to the shoe department
He thrust the third pair at me and exclaimed, “This is the perfect boot, now let’s go home and catch some of the game.” “Yes, this is the perfect boot, if she was going to stand in the middle of a lake and fish all day. You do not shop for snow boots in the aisle with the fishing gear.” “But, it’s a boot and she liked it.” “The boot is longer than her body and she liked the last boot you picked out, need I say more?”
The clock was ticking, hopes were fading and desperation was setting in. I can’t recall how many boots I looked at when I was shown the last pair. Once again I was told, “It’s a boot, buy it and we can hurry home and catch the end of the game.” For the last time I explained why the boots were unacceptable. “Remember way back, when we went to school and it was considered an insult if someone said, ‘Your mother wears combat boots,’ well, this is why.” We left the mall in the dark, in complete silence and bootless.
At home my husband got to watch the end of the ball game. He was quite loud while watching it. Only, he wasn’t cheering for his team, he was mumbling something to himself about cows, combat boots and frolicking in the snow. Honestly, I just don’t know what gets into him at times.
Weekends features Make Me Laugh. Readers share a humorous family related story or photo. Please send your submission to: firstname.lastname@example.org.